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Friday, 04 December 2009
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LSH Campaign: Khundish Poetry
At present in my campaign, the United Planets (what's left of it) is at war with the Khundish Empire. I thought my players, and a few others, might get a kick out of a little known element of Khundish Culture: Did you know that Khunds were poets? Apparently so, and here is a poem by the warlord Gak, one of their finest:
Khundia
by Gak
Dark rageful world of filth and war!
Pollution your robe, like mud on swine.
Oh, brutal!
Scabrous!
I call you mine.
Might makes right, that's what life is for...
And I'll kill anyone who says different.
Very nice. Anyways, this is not something I wrote myself, its from a DC comic, so its canon and everything.
RPGPundit
Currently Smoking: Raleigh Freehand + Altadis' Byzantium
Thursday, 03 December 2009
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Dark Fate: A Brazilian RPG Product
Hey all. Today I just wanted to let you all know about something new. A guy from Brazil wrote to me the other day, telling me about the "game" he was making in English and whether I could promote it. Now, I'm always really glad to promote anything south american, as far as hobby or geek interests are concerned.
So first, without further ado, here is the website for Dark Fate. I should note to you that I was given a PDF copy of Dark Fate to look at, and the first thing I should point out is that contrary to the first impression the site might give, Dark Fate is not actually a game of its own; its a setting with adventuring material, that requires the Swords & Wizardry Rules to run. So yes, this is Brazilian Old School!
In my opinion, as a campaign setting for OD&D (or S&W, if you will), the Dark Fate book is pretty nice. 156 pages, about 60 pages of which are gazeteer, 25 pages of NPCs, 11 pages of monsters, 7 pages of items, and the rest is miscellaneous.
Anyways, this is just to promote a fellow latin american game designer.
RPGPundit
Currently Smoking: Mastro de Paja media + H&H's Namaste
Wednesday, 02 December 2009
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You're Too Stupid to Be Religious
So I've been saying it for a long time, that my central beef with the religious is the way that they try to hide their crapulence behind a God that is not only opinionated, but whose opinions allow them to be able to like the things they like and hate the things they hate. Because by a remarkable coincidence, this god happens to hate all of the same people they hate, and want all the same things they want.
Well, now Science! has proven that I was right. Here's an article about a study made on this very subject, which demonstrates that almost across the board, when people attribute opinions to God about controversial issues, God happens to agree with them. Not only that, but they imagine that God agrees with them MORE than he does with what they imagine the "average American" would think about the subject. So it shows that religious people tend not only to think that God has the same opinions that they do, but that they are closer to God's opinion than anyone else. What a nice little intellectual circle-jerk they've got going there.
What really pisses me off about this is that it is cowardice. God becomes a pathetic kind of superhuman shield by which one can excuse one's own crapulent prejudices without having to actually defend them. And a tool by which you can further settle yourself in the smallness of your opinions rather than broaden your horizons.
Now I know, some of you here might be saying "but Pundit, we know you're not an atheist, so are you claiming that YOU have a unique and special relationship with God where you know what he really thinks?"
No. Because there is an alternative to that. And that alternative is this: some time ago I did a blog entry about how most people are too stupid to be atheists; and how most people who have gotten into "fashionable" atheism now do so as a statement of blind belief and because it lets them be smug, rather than because they have really considered, or are even capable of understanding, the deeper scientific or philosophical implications of the question.
Well, Religion has been "fashionable" for quite some time more than atheism. And I'm sorry to say, most human beings are just too stupid to be religious, too. Anyone who really thinks that God has an opinion on "affirmative action", "same sex marriage", or "the legislation of marijuana" is clearly someone who lacks the mental wherewithal to comprehend the idea of something capable of CREATING THE FUCKING UNIVERSE.
In other words, one can choose not to anthropomorphise God. Some of you geeks may have heard that word in the context of the furries: its what they do, they imagine what a dog or a cat or a wolf or an ocelot would look like if it had human features (arms, legs, etc.) and a human personality (capable of human-level thought, walking, talking, etc.). When someone take a turtle and turn it into a teenage mutant ninja, or more recently when someone takes a wolf and turns it into a hyper-endowed adult-diaper-wearer who enjoys sodomy, then you are anthropomorphising.
Likewise, if we take God, the architect of all creation, the force that very well should be beyond the capacity of human intellect to contain, and give him a political bumper sticker and opinions about such weighty matters as whether the Bailout is a good idea or whether Paris Hilton dresses like a whore, we are Anthropomorphising God.
And you do get what this means, right? It means you are turning God into something so much less than what God should be, an all-pervasive eternal force being reduced to cosplaying as a human being with all the human pettiness of vision. In other words, you're saying GOD IS A FURRY, some kind of sick fuck who likes to imagine himself and act like he was a hyperendowed human (with mary-sue-ish magic powers to boot) that gets off on S&M torture.
Is that really what any of you want, fuckers? You want God To be a Furry? Are you still so hellbent on imagining that he thinks like you, a lesser entity, thinks? Even if it was true, would you really want to worship God if he was a Furry??!
Fuck's sake. MY God is a force vast enough to create and contain the universe, it is an intelligence beyond our comprehension, that we cannot pin down intellectually, only experientially, because that's the only thing that makes any sense. And he is something so far beyond giving a fuck about the legalization of marijuana or same-sex marriage or the Iraq War or abortion that its not even funny. Its not that those aren't important issues; they are, but they're HUMAN issues. How we deal with them can certainly say a lot about how we relate to God; but this doesn't reverse into "God would vote no on Proposition 17!".
And I'm increasingly disgusted by little minds and their little gods, people Too Stupid to be Religious, fucking it up for the rest of us. And by us, I mean mankind in general.
RPGPundit
Currently Smoking: Stanwell Rhodesian + Planta's Image Latakia
Tuesday, 01 December 2009
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LSH Campaign Character Profiles: Bouncing Boy

Bouncing Boy is Chuck Taine, of Earth. As a Legionairre he's in rather a unique position: the only actual member of the Legion to also be a member of the Legion of Superheros Fanclub, and vice-versa.
Chuck is a nerd, a fairly hopeless nerd at that. He's a friendly enough guy, but he was always a little overweight, pasty-faced, shy around girls, and interested in things that definitely marked him in the "uncool" end of the teenage spectrum. Living in his mom's basement and having her drive him to his Legion try-out didn't help matters.
Of course, Bouncing Boy's powers (and the way he got them) are as goofy as his personality; he was working as an orderly in a lab in Metropolis University, and he accidentally mistook a vial full of super-secret chemical formula for his glass of kono-cola; the result was that the formula made him rounder than he was before, and able to bounce at great speeds and height, like a human rubber-ball. Chuck was overjoyed, because with this "great power" he felt he was sure to be able to fulfill his greatest dream: to join his idols in the Legion of Superheros, as "Bouncing Boy". It was like a hardcore trekkie finding out he was going to be in the next movie.
Unfortunately for Chuck, combination of the seemingly limited nature of his powers and his personality led Bouncing Boy to be rejected on his first try-out for the legion. But if there's one thing Chuck Taine doesn't know, its when to quit. He went out to become a crimefighter himself, operating out of his mother's basement (or, as Chuck calls it, "the Bouncing-Cave of Solitude"), he spent several weeks engaging in largely useless and occasionally destructive boy-scout stuff. Until, more through sheer good luck than anything else, he stumbled upon a cell of the Meglaro Crime Ring, and managed to more or less singlehandedly take them down.
This, plus the obvious fact that Bouncing Boy was not going to quit his solo activity, convinced the Legion to bring him into the LSH, figuring it'd be safer for him and for the good people of Metropolis if he was operating with the legion instead of on his own.
From these ignoble beginnings, Bouncing Boy has actually turned out to be a fairly good if never outstanding Legionairre. It turns out that Chuck's good luck has continued to serve him, leading him to more or less accidentally make the right decision on more than one critical occasion. Besides that, he's definitely come to show that his powers are quite useful in a combat situation, and he's worked hard to control and master his abilities to figure out how to effectively use his quick motion to defeat his opponents. In certain respects, he's the closest thing the Legion has to a speedster.
Chuck spent almost a year and a half as a Legion Reservist, when another lab accident caused him to lose his powers. During that time he remained in the Legion Clubhouse, working as the Legion monitor-board attendant and general help. The experience created a greater sense of maturity and responsibility in Chuck, and most of the other Legionairres couldn't help but be impressed by Chuck's determination and dedication to helping the Legion even without powers, and the humility and sincerity by which he gladly took any job available to him. Fortunately, his powers were restored this year when he was briefly a "prisoner" of the not-so-evil Prince Evillo of Tartarus.
Chuck has also showed a surprising level of leadership ability in the few instances where he's been in charge of a Legion team. In the campaign, whenever the PCs have ended up in some sort of alternate timeline, Chuck has been shown to be a heroic leader (for example, in an alternate timeline where the Khunds had successfully conquered the earth, Chuck Taine was the heroic leader of the resistance movement). Unfortunately for Chuck, no one ever ends up remembering what happened in these alternate timelines.
In terms of social relationships, Chuck is generally liked by most of the Legionairres, who see him as a friendly and kind guy, albeit occasionally annoying and often dorky. Because of these traits, as well as a serious naivete-streak in Chuck, the other Legionairres all tend to assume he's less intelligent than he really is. In fact, to control his powers, Bouncing Boy must have a fairly high level of "practical intelligence", and a high practical knowledge of mathematics and physics.
A few of the more stuck-up legionairres, like Dream Girl or Phantom Girl, really dislike Bouncing Boy; and a few like Star Boy will pick on him. Matter Eater Lad, whom Chuck mistakenly considers his "best friend", will often take advantage of Chuck's naivete and good nature, manipulating and mistreating Chuck over and over again.
Chuck doesn't care. He sees all the Legionairres as his heros, and he's just happy to get to be near them. He doesn't mind if some of his teammates make fun of him, or abuse his kindness, because he's really the rarest of all creatures: a genuinely good person.
As for girls; Bouncing Boy has a hopeless crush on Duo Damsel. He's been secretly in love with her from the moment he first saw her, but he's never dared to say so, or do anything at all about it. Only the most emotionally observant legionairres (and Saturn Girl, of course) have any clue about Bouncing Boy's feelings toward Duo Damsel. Unfortunately, Duo Damsel is utterly clueless about it. In fact, the meaner of her two selves tends to frequently tease and pick on poor Chuck.
In our game Bouncing Boy has mostly been used for comic relief, and is one of the NPCs who frequently interacts with the PCs. All of them seem to like him more or less, but his moments of naivete or nerdishness can be annoying to them in character.
Bouncing Boy has no great ambitions in the legion, he's already exactly where he wants to be. He just wants to be able to enjoy it for as long as he possibly can, it would take something really amazing to make him ever want to give up the Legion.
RPGPundit
Currently Smoking: Dunhill Amber Root Bulldog + Comoy's English Mixture
(originally posted August 25, 2007)
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